Every relationship we experience in our lifetime whether short or long is meant to be either a blessing or a lesson. We as humans are designed by default to live in a community setting where we thrive or strive. We all need to have a closer look, introspect on what a certain relationship in our life is here to teach. It could present as an intimate partner/ spouse, a parent, a sibling, a friend or a co- worker. A healthy relationship offers peace with mutual respect, acknowledgement and strength through thick and thin. Whereas a toxic & karmic relationship has an element of intense push and pull, disrespect and breach of integrity multi folds. Here I am presenting a deeper reflection of how they actually are, how to identify and protect your sanity by recognizing your own hidden potentials to ace in relationships with ease. Choosing the best and leaving the rest. There are 3 major categories of relationships, KARMIC , TOXIC and SOUL CONNECTIONS. I have divided them into 3 parts as here I am describing the key traits of a karmic relationship along with the spiritual lessons they are meant to teach. Curing a disease needs an accurate diagnosis to reflect upon your karmic patterns and unchain them with wisdom.

Karmic Relationships

Mentioned under are the types of karmic relationship patterns that must be identified. They can present as a single entity or in combination.

1. A mirroring Phenomenon :

• This relationship triggers badly
• It pushes you to look into your insecurities
• Very intense

2. The Addictive One :

• Emotional rollercoaster
• Intense attraction
• Delusional at times, ignoring the facts
• Hard to detach

3. The Rescuer- Victim Dynamics:

• The rescuer subconsciously takes the burden of his victimhood
• Rescuer is drained energetically
• Victim shows no growth
• The relationship is not going anywhere but just draining

4. The Over-Giving One:

• Over giving
• Seeking validation
• Pleasing others over self worth

5. Emotionally Unavailable:

• You chase, they run
• You crave emotional intimacy
• They are detached completely or partially

6. Short yet Intense:

• It enters with a bang
• Convinces being a fated one
• Fades away like smoke in the wind
• Creates an emotional wound

7. Dominance & Control:

• One controls and suppresses other
• Fear of lost control
• Poor boundaries with lack of respect

Now that you have identified the dynamics karmic relationships present with, lets move on to the healing part. The question arises:

What are karmic relationships meant to teach us?

We all come with our set of conditioning that is acquired by the society, some affects in childhood and others in adulthood. The inner child when wounded by lack of self worth, unable to establish healthy boundaries, attachment anxiety, fear of abandonment, fear of rejection or betrayal weakens our vibrational state. This low vibrational state attracts its equivalent counterpart, will take you on a ride to bring into your awareness your karmic patterns. This unintentionally keeps you restless, and then you intentionally start putting in the work.

”Remember your ticket to happiness arrives the moment you decide to put an end to your miseries”

A challenging decision to undertake. Its where you pause and suspend whats weighing you down. Inner work starts from here.

Why do we suffer, whats is this for?

A straightforward answer is that our soul chose this for ourself to purify and grow into a wiser, smarter and aligned version of ourself. The soul carries an imprint that aligns with ALLAH’s decree, that surrenders in times of hardships, practices patience and grows stronger in faith. Bringing balance, peace, harmony by identifying and breaking these patterns of limiting beliefs. After all its your own choice whether you want to keep suffering or opt for healing.

“Time doesn’t heal anything, it buries it deeper and deeper that surfaces in the form of physical ailments”

How to heal the damage done?

After being aware of the patterns, Self- Forgiveness is the key to success. I would recommend you to go through my blog on healing through self love. Here is the link where I have shared in details the deprogram & reprogram practical steps I followed. Click Here. I am briefly enumerating the steps to heal the emotional sepsis caused by karmic relationships.

1. Self-Awareness through deep reflection: Noticing the patterns in a relationship and connecting the dots.
2. Self-Forgiveness: Be kind to yourself, nurture your vulnerable side and protect it from predators.
3. Build an Energy Shield: Staying away and not engaging with people & situations that drain you, manipulate or push you to do things against your will. LEARN TO SAY NO.
4. Practice art of discernment: Every battle is not worth fighting, choose your battles wisely. Conserve energy, its precious.
5. Gratitude: Energy grows where it goes. Every pain is an opportunity to grow into a better self by rectifying your own shortcomings.
6. Forgiveness for others: Cut the cords permanently to save yourself as we all have our set of flaws, people tend to operate from their subconscious fears, trauma, insecurities and envy. Its not your responsibility to carry their imposed emotional baggage. Forgive and carry the lessons with you. This way there wont be any triggers, one of the indicators of healing.

What are the indicators of healing?

Following are the indicators of healing that will help you assess yourself.

1. No more triggers: The same type of situations or the same person doesn’t affect you anymore. Not threatened, no more racing heart, no more anxiety, over thinking or tears. Bravo !!!! you have crossed the bridge successfully
2. You are open to receive, HEART CHAKRA ACTIVATION: You can only receive goodness when your heart chakra is activated. This happens when you have gained inner wisdom from past sufferings, being aligned with your higher consciousness.
3. Willing to leave your comfort zone: Staying for too long in a pattern kills the potential to grow and explore. Take a breather, push that reset button.
4. Being adventurous: Trying out new things that you have never done before. Creating opportunities for yourself and others around you. Starting as small as changing the color of your hair, growing beard for men, going to a cafe alone spending time with self.
5. Living in gratitude: Gratitude for the lessons you learned, evolution you went through in this life time. “ALLAH : THE GREATEST PLANNER”. You survived and conquered the challenges you have been through.
6. Daily dose of Self_ Appreciation: Looking back at yourself then and now. You have so much to be grateful for, claiming your inner strength and power.

Final Thoughts:

As many events in our life are fated, there still are many blank pages. Its purely your own choice, determination what you write in it. Prioritizing self not in a selfish way but in a way that nurture your needs and wants, protects your peace and sanity. Being aware at an early stage will protect you from the future harm. Choose wisely and act timely thats the key to unlock good health with great happiness. Have faith in Divine as hope should never die.

“Indeed, ALLAH will not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves.”

Sur ah Ar-Ra’d 13:11